When I was younger, I never spoke. Ever. According to my family, people thought I was mute or had a speaking disability. As I got older, making friends was extremely difficult unless we knew each other personally or I was made to speak up. Fast forward 20 something years later, a Mass Communications Degree under my belt (ironically) and a partial social butterfly, I still come across these problems. Now, I know it’s completely normal to stay to yourself when in a new environment, but with me it’s different.
Last night I attended the Style Maker Awards Reveal Party and it was everything I imagined it to be. Glamour, champagne, good food, all of Dallas’s top Fashionistas, etc. En route, I was constantly going over my lines as far as making new networks and finding some new friends in the area;
“Hi, my name is Taylor and I’m a blogger, what’s yours?“..no of course, who isn’t a blogger/photographer/media maven here.
“I love this fur vest it reminds me of [insert a designer/collection here]“..they know I’m just making things up.
“Oh man, I’m just leaving from an affiliate shoot and I have a meeting in the morning“..actually no, I just left from shooting in front of my garage, and I have work in the morning.
I was confident…until I walked in. The atmosphere made you feel like you jumped out of reality and landed into The Devil Wears Prada, it was my imagination presented in front of me. I was stoked. The nicest place I’ve ever stepped foot into was Neiman Marcus (I make monthly trips to fantasize about my dream life). I wanted to literally crawl deeper into my shell, get in my car, and speed home. As I was contemplating my escape route, my alter ego stepped in and shoved my doubt out the way.
“Stop. You’ve driven 2 hours to be here and network. You may not think you dressed the part, have more knowledge, have a running website, or anything; but what you DO have is heart. You’re here, with your camera, and a working mouth. BREATHE. You got this.”
Sometimes in life, you have to give yourself a pep talk. A REAL talk. I can truly attest to the saying ‘you are your worst critic’ cause I think I could take the cake in doubting myself. After that talk with myself I started to loosen up. Sure, it was uncomfortable; that’s how life is, but it sure was rewarding. I ended up meeting some awesome ladies who were very inviting and kind, I made networks with different designers and other bloggers, and most of all, I finally tried a taco shop I was meaning to visit!